LONGEST Trip Ever: Part 3

 Day 3: 

After a refreshing few days staying with an awesome friend in Georgia, we were ready for the final leg of our trip.  The kids once again were NOT ready to be back in the car and say goodbye to their BFFs, but onward and upward.

This day was the WORST-We’d already done 14+ hours in the car and this one was supposed to be the long day-ha, I know, as if the other days we’re already long, this one was scheduled to be the longest so far at just over 8 hours….YIKES!

Once again, I’m lying to myself, believing that surely I’ve got this, blah, blah, blah….

We start out and nothing really major-this time I made it 3 hours and 30 mins before utter chaos, meltdown, car HELL.  So at least we’re improving, right?! No, actually what the delay in meltdown was, they were building it up, joining forces to make this the most grand break down we’d seen to date. 

We’re at the 3 hour mark and the kids start asking for lunch, and I behold the most miraculous sign one can see on a road trip-CHICK-FIL-A next exit! Our most favorite fast food place-when I save favorite I mean, we eat there so regularly, my children know the logo, the cows, and menu! I use a meal at Chick-fil-a for major bribes, rewards, and boo-boo cure!

 So we’re in the car, see the sign and hallelujahs rang out, the heavens opened up and at that moment life was complete.  Okay, perhaps a bit of an overstatement, but you fellow mommies will agree that sometimes you have to take the little wins b/c that may be the only win you have all day! We stop at Chick-fil-a, eat lunch, and play.  It is then time to get back on the road….

The kids begrudgingly get back in the car and that’s when it happened.  We get back on the freeway and pull away from any sign of civilization and together they begin to scream.  As I mentioned in previous days, I just block this out. 

They begin to fight with each other-which, honestly at this point, better them doing that to each other than me (I know, I’m a terrible person, but hey, you mommies can’t say you haven’t felt that way before, at least once!)

Then, the worst thing of all, DEAFENING SILENCE…Those of you with little kids know why this is so dangerous-I look in my rear view mirror and see that my 4 year old has wiggled out of the top part of her car seat and is attempting to change the 2 year old’s diaper-WITH POOP IN IT! She's managed to undo the diaper and is now pulling it out from under her sister's poopy butt. 

I don't even know what the appropriate, motherly scolding response is in that moment-so I just yell, “STOP touching your sister’s poop!” One of those things you never imagine yourself saying, then you have a couple kids and all of a sudden the weirdest, grossest, craziest things start coming out of your mouth. 

“STOP” was the wrong thing to yell b/c then she just drops diaper and now there is poop rolling around on the floor in the backseat of my car.  In my moment of confusion, still traveling 70 mph down the highway, I yell, “Why did you drop that?” Then I get an answer (with a tone that is SOOOO 16 year old attitude) “You said Stop, so I did”…. Well, yet another mommy fail, she’s absolutely right, that IS what I said. Yup, that's it, I once again was throwing up the white flag of surrender and admitting udder (stinky) defeat!

5 LONG, smelly, angry minutes pass until, I find a place to stop and clean up the mess.  As I’m picking up poop off the floor of my car, my sweet little 2 year old looks at me with a huge smile on her face and says, “Thanks, Mommy, that’s stinky”.  I couldn’t agree more, my love!

A while longer in the car, a few more lollipops, movies, and over-the-top bribes and we finally reach Tampa, Florida-also known to me during this trip as the Promised Land!!

Over the course of 3 days alone in the car with my kids, I laughed like I never have before, did things I’ve harshly judged other parents for, and learned that sanity is relative (and fleeting) with little kids.   

I do have to say, I kinda feel like Super Mom just for making it-at least until the next time I have to be trapped in a confined space with those mini-monsters (Appropriate “Mommy translation”: I love my sweet kids, I just don't want to be in the car alone with them for 22+ hours EVER AGAIN!)