You are doing an amazing job! Having a baby is the most challenging adventure you will ever take on as a woman. You are loving and nurturing your baby every day and night, despite the lack of sleep, inexperience, and huge changes, you are succeeding (and it does get easier!).
I know that every time you take out a bottle in public, you feel a sense of dread. I know that you wonder if the looks from other moms are looks of disappointment and disapproval. They are not. You are doing the best for your baby. I know that not breastfeeding is a hard choice that you very seriously considered. Maybe you work and after trying to pump, in a dark room so many times a day, you just couldn't do it anymore. That's OK, you are not cheating your baby by bottle feeding.
Or maybe for you, it was not a choice. Perhaps you tried everything and your body or baby didn't cooperate. You've agonized, lost sleep, and cried countless nights with a baby at your breast that was losing weight and still would not eat from you. I know you didn't make this choice lightly or decide to bottle feed b/c you just thought it would be easier. You tried so hard, but in the end, it just wasn't meant for you and this baby.
Rest assured, us breastfeeding moms are not better than you and we are not judging you. We are lucky it worked for us. We are blessed to have that experience, so that is why we share our thoughts, pictures, and encouragement with you, perhaps naively at times. Maybe we've said things about it that have hurt you, I am sorry, our intention is NEVER to hurt another hard working, caring mom.
Your sweet baby doesn't love you any less b/c you snuggle her, lovingly in your arms, with a bottle instead of a breast. She is still your baby, she is still bonding with you every time you hold her, feed her, and talk to her. You are not robbing your baby of any of your love by not breastfeeding.
There is not a "Breastfed" or "Bottle fed" box to check of on your child's college application. No one asks in a job interview if your child was breastfed or bottle fed. You are raising a baby who is going to be a meaningful part of society, breastfed or not. So take a deep breath, and stop feeling guilty.
Next time you take out that bottle in public, know that we are all in this together, us Moms! We are trying our best to do what we can to love and nurture our kids. Stop worrying about what everyone else thinks about you not breastfeeding! You are a great mom and you're doing great at the most difficult job in the world.
Love and Sisterhood,
Breastfeeding Mom
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