YIKES! how terrible that sounds when you say it? We replay that horrible sentiment back to God, as if He must not know how "good" we've been.
But truly consider how you sometimes may feel that too-the guy at work who is a total jerk gets the promotion over your hard working husband; That teenage girl who is suddenly pregnant, while you and your husband have been praying and trying for years to have a child of your own; The family down the street in all kinds of careless debt gets to just walk away from their house, but you put all your hard-earned money down on your house and now cannot sell it to move on to the next stage in your life. It's not fair, why would God allow that or give those people the things you so desperately yearn for.
As I was praying about our future, I pulled that "It's not fair!" 3-year-old whiny stuff with God.
His answer was instant-He said, "Kim, why do you even worry about her-You are a sinner just like her! Look at all I have given you-how sad that you're missing what I'm really showing you. When I make you wait or saying "No!" to the things you THINK you want, it is because I have something so much better for you!! I will take care of all of the things that weigh on your heart, but you have allow Me to do it, not you, not the world, ME!"
I thought about what God told me during our prayer time, the question I kept thinking, was "Why?" not "Why did God answer me that way" but "Why do I feel the need to constantly ask Him for something more or greater than what I already have?"
The answer is humbling: I am selfish and unthankful. No mincing words here-God has given me so much, so much that others pray for and sometimes never get. I have a Godly husband, wonderful children, enough money to stay home with my kids and still provide comfortably for the entire family. More than that, I have a God and Savior who has something so amazing for me, that my human desires can't even imagine its greatness! He has answered all of those prayers with abundance, so why do I continue to wonder if what He's doing for someone else means He's not doing for me?! I know He's got this-He always has and even in my greatest moments of disappointment, He's brought me things I never would've thought to ask for, better things!
So I am working on being truly thankful: Heart Thankful. The "God, I am thankful that YOU are in charge and I will not doubt that what you are providing for me is exactly what I need for Your plan in my life, even if I don't understand it now!" Because true Heart Thankfulness is actually true faith and joy as well!
I encourage you to also pray the Heart Thankful Prayer above! Let's see what God reveals as we follow him in full faith, joy, and thanks!
